Learning How to Have Safe Lesbian Sex
What did you learn in sex education? If you were lucky enough to get it at all, chances are it focused mainly on heterosexual intimacy—penis in vagina—and how to do it safely. But what about safe sex when it comes to other sexualities?
Lesbian relationships have frequently been overlooked, misunderstood, and downright ignored when it comes to sexual safety. If you’re wondering how can you stay clean and safe when you’re getting down and dirty with another woman, we’ve got you covered.
Read on to find out how to have safe (and fun) lesbian sex.
What You Need to Know About V-to-V Sex
There’s plenty of misinformation out there about lesbian sex, including the belief that you’re at less risk for STD transmission if you’re having sex with another woman, which isn’t true. In addition to common STDs and STIs, you also have to consider concerns like yeast infections and trichomonas vaginalis (TV), which can be passed between people with vaginas when they have sexual contact
Lesbian sex that includes genital contact or fluid exchange carries the risk of passing on unwanted (and not fun) infections, so protecting yourself is really important.
Start With Healthcare
Before you even get to the bedroom, the best way to ensure your confidence and safety is to keep up with your sexual healthcare as often as you need. This can be challenging at times for women who have sex with other women, as many healthcare providers aren’t as educated on the risks and other factors impacting lesbian sex as they are with heterosexual relationships.
Look for providers who are LGBTQ-friendly and informed, and always advocate for yourself when it comes to your sexual health—your needs and experiences are likely to be a little different to women who primarily have sex with men, and your provider needs to recognize that.
Communication is Everything
It might feel weird bringing up sexual health with a new partner, but it shouldn’t! The reality is that safety is sexy and being proactive shows that you care about both your health and the health of your partners.
Before starting a new intimate relationship, ask your partner about any current STI or STD status and ask them about their most recent test. You can start the conversation by sharing yours, or even better, suggest that you both head to the clinic together for a fresh test.
Barrier Protection for Lesbian Sex
When you think about barrier protection for sex, chances are your mind goes right to a condom—but there are actually a variety of barrier methods you can use for girl-on-girl sex. Dental dams, for example, are the best way to have safe, enjoyable oral sex with a person with a vagina; they’re small squares of latex that are lightly draped over the vulva to avoid fluid transmission.
You can find pre-made dental dams, or you can make them out of condoms in a pinch by cutting off the ends and along the seam of the condom to create a solid sheet of latex. Spread the cut condom (lubed side down) on the vagina before you or your partner go to town.
Finger Penetration Protection
Finger penetration, like fingering, fisting, or anal stimulation, may have a lower risk for STD and STI transmission, it still has a risk. This is particularly true if you have any open cuts or are swapping digits between you and your partner. Latex gloves or finger condoms (small latex sheaths to cover fingers used for insertion) are a great way to ensure extra protection.
When it comes to using your hands, always make sure that you and your partner have clean, short, and rounded nails so you don’t snag a sensitive spot!
Staying Safe with Sex Toys
Sex toys are an amazing way to indulge in same-sex intimacy with another woman. Whether you enjoy dildos, vibrators, or dual-stimulation toys, they’re an awesome way to provide new kinds of stimulation to both you and your partner. But, like anything you’re using to stimulate your genitals, they can be carriers of bodily fluids which might put you at risk for STD and STI exposure.
Toys for internal use, such as dildos, should be used with condoms, and those condoms should be swapped out for a new one every time the toy is used on a different person or in a different part of the body.
Vibrators and external toys should be cleaned before being swapped between partners, and these can also be used with condoms and other barrier protections too—just make sure you find one that’s a good fit to avoid slippage or breaks!
Looking to explore something new in your sex life?
Check out the Iridescence Vibrator, with both internal and external points of stimulation, twelve vibration settings, and a totally waterproof design, there are endless ways for you and your partner to play.